Talking today

David Letterman: Russell Brand, Charlie Haden

Jay Leno: Steve Carell, Joel Levinson, Beck

Late Late Show: Seann William Scott, Kathy Kinney

Conan O'Brien: Frank Caliendo, Joshua Radin

Last Call: Kevin Nealon, Yelle

Daily Show: T. Boone Pickens

Colbert Report: Bob Woodward

Jimmy Kimmel: Julia Louis Dreyfus, Dave Annable, Julianne Hough

The View: Amy Brenneman, Alicia Keys

Regis and Kelly: Daniel Craig, David Archuleta

Ellen DeGeneres: Emma Thompson, Dido

Tavis Smiley: Jeffrey Toobin, Ben Ratliff

Chelsea Lately: David Alan Grier, Iliza Shlesinger, Jim Florentine, George Wallace

George Stroumboulopoulos: Peter C. Newman, Serena Ryder

Bonnie Hunt: Neal McDonough, Guy Fieri, The Amazing Race castoffs Kelly and Christy

Letterman's Top 10

(from The Late Show with David Letterman, Nov. 10, 2008)

Top 10 things overheard during the Bush/Obama meeting

10. "You sure you want this job?"

9. "Actually, sir, I do mind if you call me 'Barack-odile Dundee.'"

8. "Let me know if you want the Secret Service to frisk you for fun."

7. "I appreciate the offer, but you can take the spittoons with you."

6. "Honest opinion -- would it be a mistake to pardon Amy Winehouse?"

5. "Is that Roger Clinton sleeping on the sofa?"

4. "The red phone is for talking to world leaders; the blue phone is for ordering Domino's."

3. "When there's a big crisis, you might be here as late as 4 p.m."

2. "Other than the economy, Iraq, Afghanistan, Iran, the deficit, the crumbling infrastructure, our energy policy, Gitmo and global warming, is there anything else I need to fix?"

1. "When can you start?"

Late-night laughs

(from Nov. 10, 2008)

The Tonight Show with Jay Leno

Today was another historic day. President Bush took President-elect Barack Obama on a tour of the White House. At one point, Barack Obama opened a closet and Bush said, "Don't open that!" and a huge stack of unread intelligence memos fell out.

Late Show with David Letterman

Earlier today, Barack Obama met with President Bush at the White House. So you had the president-elect and the president inept.

As soon as Obama shook hands with President Bush, Obama's ratings went down 10 points.

Late Night with Conan O'Brien

According to a new report, thousands of pregnant mothers in this country are planning to name their baby Barack. After hearing this, Sarah Palin told her daughter Bristol, "Don't even think about it."

Since becoming the president-elect, Barack Obama has been getting the same daily national security briefings that President Bush receives. Except when they brief Obama, national security advisers are allowed to leave in the "scary parts."

Today in music history

In 1945, Canadian rock singer and songwriter Neil Young was born in Toronto. He spent his teen years in local rock bands in Winnipeg and Toronto, before moving to Los Angeles and becoming a founding member of Buffalo Springfield in 1966. That band broke up in 1968, largely because of tensions between Young and another group member, Stephen Stills.

-- Hamilton Spectator Internet and wire services